So, Granny and I were talking the other day, and I commented that I can’t wait to move so that I will actually be able to corral Bean with baby gates. As it stands now, the layout of our house and the extra wide doorways in the main living areas make it impossible to keep […]
I have been living with the rude awakening that, no matter how fit you WERE, taking a 9-month hiatus from exercise means that you basically start back at square one. When I am not hobbling around like a cartoon character, I’m doing whatever bizarre stretches I can think of to alleviate soreness. The treadmill laughs […]
Though I’ve been steeped in denial for weeks, and hoping if I ignored it, it would go away, Bean’s first birthday arrived. I’m not ready for her to be a year old. Not one bit. I understand that my alarming level of depression is completely disproportionate to the situation, but even the thought of her […]
Than to set Bean next to a pile of clean, folded laundry while I answered the phone. Didn’t I learn my lesson last time? She abhors anything that is stacked or organized. She must create disarray where she perceives order. She thunders through my house like Godzilla, and the rest of us are the citizens […]
Back when Bean started solid food, I posted my plan to do the homemade baby food thing. After struggling with two of the pickiest eaters ever born, I hoped that making Bean’s food would help avoid a repeat of the epic toddler food wars. My reasoning was simple: jarred baby food tastes like ass, […]
Being the favorite all the dang time!
Prepare for consequences. That, my friends, is an entire package of wet wipes. A package of wet wipes she got open and emptied one wipe at a time in the two minutes it took me to brush my teeth and my hair. Yep…..
Bean has a big head. No, seriously, the kid has a ginormous head. When I go for her check-ups, and the doctor runs down the growth chart with me, it goes a little something like this: “Now, everything looks good…her weight is in the 75th percentile, her height is in the 55th percentile, but don’t […]
“I see you’re making a cake…” “What do you mean I can’t have any?!? We’ll see about that!” “HMMMMMM CAKE!!” It’s kind of difficult to tell the little beast “no” when she has an entire houseful of guys on her side.
They melt my heart…that is, when they aren’t making me tear my hair out and hide in the bathroom.